The Bisexual

I do not care if someone is bisexual but I do not want to date someone of that persuasion at this stage in my life. This is a guy's description who likes me.

Really!

These were sent as my matches.   I'm concerned.  What type of impression did I make on this dating site?

The Insultor

How nice of him to insult me.  When I confronted him about his insults, he told me he doesn't like dating lawyers bc they are aggressive.  This man is a moron. 

The Misogynist

Saw this on a guy's profile.   Good luck with that.

The Dumb Tourist

This guy also gave me his phone number and hotel information.   I wonder if he made it out of NYC without being mugged.

Another Clueless Man

Even asks to hear back if I'm interested and then when gets no response,  writes again. 

The Deptessed Man

Dating is obviously not a walk in the park for anyone doing online dating, but thanks for your depressing message.

"The American Dream"

His "American dream."  No bueno.

Presumptuous Pet Name

The first contact he has with me is calling me "sweetie?"  Too much!

Pushy

I'm so writing this guy back bc he "needs to talk to me." 

Mr. Clueless

If I didn't write back the first two times, I'm not writing back the next few times.  Damn he's persistent.

Mr. Forgetful

The guy who forgets that he already wrote you. 

Bad Grammar

Nice guy but "conversant?"

The Profile Name Says It All

He's a bit full of himself.

Bad Joke

Old people are his cause.  Not funny. 

Call Me

No hello.  Just "call me." 

The Savior

My savior?  Wtf.  Just creepy.

"Good sexy wife"

So I guess he wants a slave. 

Just to Hook-up

If I was looking for a hook-up,  I'd go on a hook-up site.  I'm not here to make this guy feel better bc his last relationship was a failure.

The Foot Fetish

Shoe shopping?   I'm thinking this is an excuse to see my feet.

The Jewish Experiment

So I'm supposed to answer your creepy question about Jewish women? 

The Cougar Fetish

Being called an older woman is my life long dream.  Lol.  I am not interested in fulfilling some young man's cougar fetish.

"Wrap u up like a snack wrap"

Is this some sort of strange religous ritual?  I have no interest in being any guy's "snack wrap."

"Alluring eyebrows"

I have never known a man to find eyebrows alluring.  This must be a fetish.

The Swingers

This couple actually is trolling on a dating site using the husband's picture to look for threesomes.  Ommm....go on a swingers site.

LOL

The last thing I want to read after being called "super sexy" is "lol."

"Has a little tummy"

When describing youself, I'm going to assume a "little tummy" means your a pudge ball.

The Guy Who Assumes a Troublemaker

"You behaving?"  So this guy has already assumed that I'm a trouble maker.  Next!

Le petite penis

First message to me is about small penises.  While he has no hope of a girl loving him and then finding out he has a small penis.  Clearly he has a small penis. 
Regardless of his penis size, what woman would ever want to have a conversation with him?  Not me.  I am not interested in him nor his little penis. 

The Penis Guy

For some reason guys love sending pics of their penis even if it is small, soft,  ugly etc. 

But some men are slicker than this guy.  These men at least send normal messages back and forth between with you and trick you to text with them and then boom in the middle of a normal call conversation their penis makes a premier. 

This guy went right for it in his first ever communication with me.

Hugs!? No thanks.

First message to me is want to hug me and I'm "huggable?"  Do I like a teddy bear? 

Corny

Telling a woman that you will "turn their frown upside down" is just corny. 

Sounds like you are talking to a child.  Also, prob one of those annoying guys who always will ask you what you are thinking about.  Hate that.

Desperate

Writing multiple messages before I have even responded just makes a man look too desperate.  Also telling somone would make their life is too much pressure.

The Trite Why Are You Single Question

Please don't ask me why I'm single.   Enough said.  Btw, do you really want to hear that story? 

The Inquisitor

First time ever communicate with me is a major question!? 

Ommm....no

The tourist

So guys go thru pictures of women in places they will be visiting to look for sex?   I did know guys were such planners.  But, no, I'm not interested in being your tour guide and having sex with you while you are on vacation.

Friends with Benefits

If I wanted a friends with benefits arrangement,  I wouldn't be doing online dating or I'd say that in my profile. 

This guy thinks he is something special. 

Stop with the bad jokes!

So not into bad jokes! 

"I want to drink your bath water"

I do not know what to even say about this post, but is bath water ever appetizing?   Nope!

The Bad Joke

I'm a lawyer and the last thing that I want to hear is a bad joke.  

Another man that did not receive a reply.

The Masturbator

No, I don't care if you are masturbating and even creepier that I'm the object of your masturbation. 

Men, do you want the first words to a women you are dating and possibly marry that you are "masturbating!?"  I hope not.

TMI

Suffice to say I never wrote the virgin back.  Men, do not let your first message to a girl be disclosing your virginity.  No one wants to know that information.  

About my blog

I have lived in St. Thomas the last five (5) years and thought dating was difficult there because it is a small population so not much of a selection.  

I moved to NYC all excited to start dating, and I figured that online dating would ve a great start.  However, I have learned that dating is hard everywhere. 

On a good note, I'm able to start this blog with the crazy messages I have received.  Just a little something to make you laugh.